I’ll turn a quarter of a century this summer, so I can’t exactly say that my 21st birthday was ages ago. twenty-one was a special year for me. It’s one of those key moments. A defining ages where you become who you are – yet the future is still an unknown adventure. I vividly remember wishing that I could be twenty-one for ever.
So when I met with the Forever21 team last week, talking abour their store opening that is finally happening in Amsterdam this month, we couldn’t help but wonder… What if we could be 21 again, and know what we know now? Next thing I knew, I was writing down twenty-one things I would tell my younger self. Let’s go!
1. Be happy on your own. Finding happiness within yourself is a big one for me. Not from anyone else, and certainly not from any thing. If you don’t rely on others to make you feel complete (gosh, the immense pressure!), you’ll enjoy being with them that much more. And vice versa. Crazy cycle, isn’t it?!
2. Change is a must. You’ll probably never find a better moment in your life to take (calculated!) risks. This isn’t to say you shouldn’t be smart about things, quite the opposite actually. But constant change is a must to grow.
3. Own YOU. There is only one of you on this very planet. So it’s perfectly fine to be different and not to fit right in. In fact, it’s waaay more fun.
4. Know that everything is a building block. You’ll only get to a point in the future because of what you are doing now. Enjoy it, because it’s happening.
5. You aren’t a mind reader, so stop making assumptions. You are not a mind reader and you certainly aren’t Mel Gibson in ‘What women want’. So no. You don’t know what someone else is thinking, how they feel, or why they behave in a certain way. Gather some guts and ASK ‘em.
6. Painting the walls of your room yellow, orange and purple in one session is never a good idea.
7. Travel far and live abroad. Spend at least six months living – and working or going to school – in a different country. An experience like that changes your perspective on everything.
8. You don’t need everyone to like you. Really, the world won’t stop spinning if one person doesn’t think you’re the most awesome thing to have ever happened to this planet. (FYI: you totally are).
9. Money matters, but it’s not a mission. Build up some kind of back-up. It will give you peace of mind and helps you out when things don’t go as planned, which is a realistic option with the new things you’ll be trying out.
10. Always give it your best, yet stay humble. It will take you everywhere.
11. You’ll never figure it all out. Even though it’s a few years later, I’m still working on many of these ‘life lessons’. Truth is, you’ll never have everything in check.
12. If they miss you, they’ll call.
13. Keep your body healthy. Take care of your body. This is where you create habits for the rest of your life, and taking bad care of yourself affects everything else.
14. Sort out what is holding you back. If certain people, past mistakes, current doubts are pulling you down and making you insecure, it’s time to tackle them (perhaps with a professional) and letting them go.
15. Spend some time alone every day.
16. Always read the little letters. Before you sign a contract or say yes to a collaboration, read the little letters. Ask yourself what a worst case scenario would be, and how this affects you in the long term.
17. Be kind to yourself. It’s OK to make mistakes. You’ll start a bunch of new things - friendships, relationships, school, a business, a quest for your true self, a quest for the ideal skinny jeans… Chances are you’ll fail the first few times. Chill out about it.
18. Success never comes easy. But if you find a passion and do what makes you tick, it will be easy to work hard.
19. Don’t get caught up in the little things… Who cares if you own the latest designer bag, or what some guy did or didn’t say in a text message, or if your latest blog post was perfect or not.
20. …but appreciate the little things. Because one day you’ll look back and realize they were the big things.
21. Everyone has the right to a grilled salami & cheese sandwich. And to the perfect black heels. And to making out for a few minutes, dancing all night with girlfriends and eating chocolate on the couch until your stomach hurts. Those things always help figure things out.
So these are some lessons I’ve learned and things I’m still working on. Any one that you agree with? Tell me in the comments! PS. photo by Karen.
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BY THIS CHICK'S GOT STYLE
Welcome to CHAPTER FRIDAY! Your online toolkit to an awesome and successful life, curated by Yara (and team of supergirls). Hopefully you are excited about this next chapter, and the natural transformation of fashion blog This chick's got style. Find out more about that process here. Kind of miss the old This chick's got style? Hop on over to Yara's corner, where you'll find two years of blog archives to dig into plus a daily personal post.
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Yara Michels is a professional blogger, all-round business chick, award nominated marketing author and freelance ELLE writer. She hosts blogging masterclasses, takes on online cases for big companies and is an experienced speaker on online topics. Curious yet?
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Always reading, but never commenting but now I have to! I agree with everything and these are the lessons I learned (myself) too when getting older. Thanks for this inspirational post and btw I love your blog change, such a mature extra to the (fashion) blogs around. x
I appreciate your comment a lot, thanks for supporting the new CHAPTER FRIDAY
Oh what a lovely blogpost. Im 21 and will diffinately breathe these tips/thoughts in!!! Thankyou Yara
Hope to be like you one day!
I never comment on blog posts even though I read them a lot, but I need to say… I love you, Yara
I’m almost 28 and have kinda difficult times for myself recently, because of confronting reality, and I’ve just started to realize all these things. And it’s a long way to go for me to finally understand these things, instead of only know them. So this it what I need now more than ever 
I feel like you can be the best friend for everyone, Yara!
Ahw, Anna. This is such a sweet comment. It sounds like you’re starting to figure it all out, so good luck to you.
Haha SO funny to read your 21 things to tell your younger self… I must say I agree with all of them.. Funny part is that I did go abroad for 7 months (internship) when I was 21, I lived with my (at that time) boyfriend who is my husband today.. So it was a pretty big step for me and difinitely refining for where and who I am today… and it’s not that long ago for me as well… Turning 25 in the end of this year.
I’ve bookmarked this post! These things are all so important that they will need to be revisited. A great read that brightened a hard day. Keep up the inspiring work Yara, you are something special
x
Wise thoughts!
http://fashionmusingsdiary.blogspot.fr
These are actually great to know at an older age as well. Especially if you haven’t matured. Great points. Thanks for sharing from 3girls1apple.com
I just simply adore this post <3 I'm 22 now and sometimes I feel like the world is caving in around me and sometimes I feel like I can conquer the world. Definitely needed this post today! xx
http://whenyouthinkhappiness.wordpress.com/
I’m so happy to hear this came at a good time : )
I truly value these kinds of posts, i’m turning 21 soon and already i’m telling myself once your birthday arrives, live everyday to the fullest because you’ll want to be that age forever. These posts help me to learn from others mistakes and gain advice, i truly love and appreciate it.
Thank you so much. I mean it.
http://www.itsmylittlethings.blogspot.com
Als we dat allemaal op ons 21ste geweten haddne
Heel leuk geschreven! x
http://www.rougeuse.com
This is one of the best blog posts I’ve ever read. Having just turned 21 every single one of these things is appropriate! So thank you and keep up the amazing work xx
love this. http://cheekychicxx.blogspot.com/
What a fun and inspiring post! And you are so right by the way. It is nice with such a positive post - not that you are usually negative - I just really needed a boost like this today
Emma
http://www.thecasualcliche.blogspot.dk
Go get ‘em today Emma! You can do it : )
super clevere, interesting and funny
http://franchemeetsfashion.blogspot.cz/
I’m turning 21 next week so this list is absolutely wonderful for me at this time
x
it’s interesting because I turn 21 this month and was just thinking about what I would say to my 16 year old self…I think ‘you’ll never figure it out’ is such an important thing to remember in your twenties as when you are a teenager you assume you’d have it all together by now! X
http://www.tamsinamy.blogspot.co.uk
hahaha zo leuk om te lezen ! <3
Really like this post, is always nice to see a bit of personal reflection and I think it works as a motivational tool for future you as an extra!
North of London - Beauty Blog
I love this post! I turn 21 in a couple of weeks and will keep these in mind
Danielle
Smitten with Sunday
Leuke dingen. Sommige dingen had ik ook graag op voorhand geweten
Super post!!
xo
Zo leuk! Ik moet ook veel meer leren loslaten dus deze tips waren écht handig:)
I can´t believe you´re 24! You´re so mature that I can´t imagine you being my age… That kind of makes me feel inmature. It´s so impressive all that you have done and you´re only 25! wow!
I couldn’t agree more! Mooi gezegd!
Thanks so much for sharing this! You gave some great advice!
http://mividabonitaa.blogspot.nl/
Super leuk om te lezen! En aangezien ik pas 15 ben een paar handige tips om mee te nemen!
Absolutely love this list!
I love all of this! It’s great to remember at any day!
http://www.loveandclothing.com
Heel herkenbaar! Vooral het jezelf zijn en ook blij zijn als je alleen bent.
Liefs
Aw, leuk lijstje
ik ben pas 21 geworden dus deze post viel me gelijk op! Nummer 7 ben ik alvast van plan, ik vertrek in september namelijk naar Finland op Erasmusstage!
Thanks for this post <3 Bookmarked it and wil read it over and over! I'm turning 21 this summer
http://www.whatsashawears.com
Hele leuke post! En eindelijk een forever 21 in het kikkerlandje
http://www.fashion-hooked.blogspot.com
Aah, superleuke post! Ik heb er echt zin in dat er straks een Forever 21 is in Amsterdam! Moest wel echt lachen om nummer 6. Ervaring? Haha! Ben het eigenlijk met al je tips wel eens
I agree with these points…I remember being very shy at 21…although when I look back at photographs….I could kick myself!!
http://vodkaandarose.blogspot.co.uk
love this post! Droom veel en ben ook blij met wat je allemaal hebt! xx
Those are some great tips. I’m 21 and made life way to complicated for way to long, haha!
niceee
http://WWW.MOUSTACHIC.COM
so cute post! :*
http://landing-in-fashion.blogspot.com/
Wat een leuke post!
Geweldige post, zó fijn om te lezen, zeker omdat ik een stukje jonger ben
Wat leuk Leneth! Ben benieuwd waar je je later in herkent
Wat een leuke post, heel leuk om te lezen! Ik ben het zo’n beetje eens met alles hahah. X
Super leuk om te lezen!
Super leuke post, het klopt allemaal!!
You’re wise beyond your years Yara!
I’m 41, so I’ve already pretty much figured that out myself. One of the most important thing to me was ‘You don’t need everyone to like you’. It’s a tough lesson, but it makes your grow up.
Mafalda ❤
http://mafaldadotzero.blogspot.fr
Ahw, that’s sweet! That’s absolutely a valuable one. There’s no point in seeking approval from everyone. Just listen to your best friends and closest family and in the end make your own decisions
So much more peace of mind, haha!
Wat een superwijze tips allemaal! Grappig, want ik word volgende maand 21. Veel van deze dingen klinken bekend!
Love,
Rowan
Personal Style Blog http://WWW.REDREIDINGHOOD.COM
Wat een goeie post!
Liefs Nora / 1310bynora.com
Haha awesome post. I don’t know purple on the wall can look quite good haha
xx Mira
http://www.glamdevils.com
Add some orange and yellow and it looks like you’re on mushrooms
One of those three would be nice though.
great thoughts!!!I’d add dream big cos (so cliche…)sky is the limit!!!
http://www.mymoodmyday.com